the taboo topic

8 Jan

While i was blogsurfing, i came across this blog which was bookmarked. Click here and there and found this gem of an article. The author is a parent himself, speaking of the harms and benefits of sex ed in school.

I was never a fan of those, maybe im secretly jealous of the younger generation who got the chance at it. When little me was secondary school, i was such a shy girl. Don’t have many male friends because of that shyness. I grew out of it gradually in JC and poly, Alhamdulilah. Being shy is nothing to be ashamed of, it has made some actions natural to me.

Remembered in secondary 2 when we studied sexual reproduction during our ‘boring’ science lessons, the male species would laugh uncontrollably. What is there to be so excited about?! The test scores for that topic would be especially high. The male species would be most alive during that time of the day’s lesson. Maybe the jokes passed around during that time was beyond my innocence which explains why i didn’t take an interest in them.

In secondary school, we had maybe one or two sessions of sex education which i vaguely remember to be about abortion and the pain involved in the forcep method (using a device to extract the foetus out). The video was about STD’s as well.  We went into the AVA room thinking it was sex we were going to watch. *just imagine the excitement the male species displayed*

I think sex education has improved a great deal today. Must ask the teachers!

But then again, im not a fan of sex education because i dont think they’re any use. Many kids still want to experiment. There is so much the school can do to prevent unwanted pregnancies and its likes because the responsibility remains largely with the parents. There is a gap of months of school holidays when kids dont have much to do and no one to guide them, except the internet.

If you prevent them from using the internet, the school is making them use the internet for projects. I think its like the game you play in the arcades where you hit one head(in front), another grows on your left and when you hit that in, another grows from your right…..it never ends.

No one said parenting is easy. Similarly, planning a wedding is not an easy task, ensuring a lifetime of bliss (marriage) is an even harder thing to do. The author mentioned that its a fixed plan all parents encourage their children to have – child to teenager to University student to young adult establishing career to wife/husband. (The author couldnt have said it better)

Why should it be this way? Because weddings are costing a lot nowadays! Young adults cannot afford it. But the Prophet s.a.w said the best of weddings are the ones which cost the least and where poor people are invited. Many young couples in Singapore, of a certain race tend to head straight for a divorce in the following few years of their young marriage. The reason people draw upon is, that they are too young and immature to be in a marriage. There are many reasons…

I think one should go into a marriage when one is sure. And that should not take long, considering people of the past who got married to people their parents chose for them and yet they live happily to this day. Go into a marriage with the correct mindset and the correct intention – the purest…for Allah and to avoid zina.

There is a useful link in his article in which he addresses these questions related to Muslim parenting issues when sex education is involved and even shares his experience as a young adolescent.

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One Response to “the taboo topic”

  1. sistermable September 15, 2010 at 6:58 am #

    I know it’s been a while since your post, but the topic of healthy sex education is dear to me. I’ve been following this woman on Twitter – @PersonaMomGrata and she recently wrote THIS about her approach to raising sexually healthy kids. It’s a great perspective: http://shelovessex.com/2010/08/birds-and-bees/

    Another really gorgeous post, when talking to girls about their blossoming sexuality, is here: http://thebeautifulkind.com/columns/tbk-saga/mango-talk Enjoy!

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