Archive | April, 2010

reflection ~ part of being a SW

29 Apr

Nothing is perfect.

I would have to accept that i can always have it my way. I will try, Insyallah 🙂

My way is not the best.

I dont know everything.

I cant shape everyone’s life.

I might be doing more harm than good, despite my intention.

I must be aware of other’s confort zone.

Everyone has a choice.


Protected: i wouldnt have been able to do this if it were not for the imperfect rose

26 Apr

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

what we do 5 times a day…

25 Apr

I think we need reminders of why we are here, time and again, to not be led into the pleasures of this world. I feel something amiss now that i dont have the weekly reminders i used to take for granted. It used to serve as an iman booster, if not alot, the little it does definitely was worth it. Reading blogs is one way 🙂


The Five Categories of People who Pray

Article from

Author: Al Imaam Ibn Qayyim al Jawzeeyah
Reference: Al Waabil as Saayib: Vol. 1 P. 138

The first: The category of the oppressor to himself, the negligent one, one who is deficient in performing ablution for it, negligent with its appointed time periods, its boundaries and its pillars.

The second: One who preserves it appointed time periods, its boundaries, its outward pillars and ablution for it. However, he forsakes striving against his own self from whisperings and thinking to himself, and so is preoccupied with whisperings and thoughts.
The third: One who preserves its appointed time periods, its pillars as well as strives against himself in repelling whisperings and distracting thoughts that overcome him, he is busy in striving against his enemy in order to prevent him from stealing his prayer, he is in prayer as well as Jihaad.

The fourth: One whom when he stands for prayer perfects its rights, its pillars and its boundaries. His heart is occupied with preserving its boundaries and preventing anything of it being lost, rather all his attention is directed to performing it as it should be, in its most complete and perfect form, his heart is occupied with the prayer and worshiping his Lord the Elevated with it.

The fifth: One who performs the prayer like the previous person, but in addition to this, he has taken his heart and presented it to his Lord. He looks at his Lord with his heart, fully concerned with Him, in utmost obedience out of love and reverence for Him, it is as if he sees and witnesses his Lord. All distracting thoughts and whisperings fade away and the veil between him and his Lord is removed. The difference between this person in his prayer and others, is greater and better than all that is between the heavens and earth, he is fully occupied and overjoyed with his Lord in his prayer.

The first category is punished, the second is held accountable, the third is pardoned, the fourth is rewarded and the fifth is brought close to his Lord, because he gains a portion of what made the prayer a delight to him.

For whoever is delighted with his prayer in the life of this world, will be delighted by being close to his Lord in the afterlife as well as being delighted with his Lord in this life, and whoever is delighted with Allaah, everything would be delighted with him, and whoever is not delighted with Allaah the Elevated, his soul will be torn apart for the life of this world in loss.

It is narrated that when a servant stands for prayer, Allaah the Glorified says; “Remove the veil.”, and if the servant turns away He says: “Replace it.”

This ‘turning away’ has been explained as the turning of the heart away from Allaah the Mighty to other than Him. So if he turns away, the veil is replaced between him and his Lord and Shaytaan enters and presents worldly affairs to him, he shows them to him in the image of a woman. But if he turns with his heart to Allaah and does not turn away, Shaytaan would not be able to come between Allaah and that heart, he only enters if the veil is replaced. If he returns to Allaah the Elevated with his heart, the Shaytaan would escape, and if he turns away, the Shaytaan would return, such is his state with his enemy in prayer.

does the past matter?

21 Apr

Its a little small but i think you can click on it to look read the words.

From one of my readings Listening, the forgotten Skill by Madelyn, Burley Allen

” One factor influencing how people get to be the listeners they are is how they were stroked as children. How children are listened to can be positive or negative strokes. A child’s behavior is often formed by the way he or she is paid attention to or receives recognition from others, a phenomenon dealt with by the late Dr Eric Berne, author of Games People Play. Through his research, Dr Berne found that strokes were a vital aspect in formulation of behavioral patterns. “

Is the past important?

I think it is, but i couldnt give a reason why. I just knew it was.

My arguments:

– if the past is not important, why were we made to study History? And why would there be History Majors doing their Masters?

– Our past is what make us who we are today, no?

I am no longer the shy, introverted girl because of my GP teacher in JC who encouraged me to speak up in class no matter if im certain if im right or wrong.

I am the girl who would speak up for herself if she feels injustice has been done because my mother has taught me so. (simple ones of course :), like if the waiter is taking too long to bring my food to me or if bank officer dont seem to be able to serve me well because i know the accounts better than he does)

I am the girl who was brave enough to do mindless, crazy stuff because my parents trusted me and gave me the wings? (I feel afraid for myself when i think back how careless i was when i travelled) I think it has to do with how i view my older brother as a role model (but dont tell him!). He ‘taught’ me the way to get the things i want and that i have to fight for it if i really want it, simultaneously ensuring that i still get my parents blessings.

For instance, there are trigger words related to the issues of my past which can fill a whole bucket of my tears. So then, does it not matter? Nothing very serious but to me it was and it still affects me the same way when i talk about it. Understanding it allows others to empathise with me and understand why i react the way i do. Similarly, i want to colour the pictures of your past so that i can see them clearly.

Now im just trying to prove my point that our past does matter because it determines who we are. It is how we were raised which determines alot of how we are today. Understading it can help us understand why the person behaves the way he does today and guides us in our behavior towards the children tomorrow. 

Do feel free to comment 🙂

mishmash ^^

11 Apr

Look at the little hearts on the cream and on the cupcake 🙂

There was also tepung gomak which according to *I* was bitter…

And the one coated in chocolate is the malay keropok. I thought it was rather creative.

There was someone making roti jala on the spot. Cool eh?


Next up, Mr banana! I love him! So cute and cuddly *if only he was bigger* *small sigh*

I love bananas like crazy! Speaking of which, i should go grab one to munch on now 🙂 *here i come banana*

I should have taken a picture of 3 little stickers stuck to my table – pictures of banana doing different stuff, taken from real bananas bought from the supermarket.


Lastly, presenting to you the yummy, Chocolate snowflakes 🙂

I had a wonderful time sharing this with *ahem* *wink* thank you sayang!

Had more delicious nutella cake when i came home.

I better watch my sugar intake! Ciao people!

a reminder for us all to wary of shaitan

10 Apr

How Shaitan misled a pious worshiper

Barsisa was a monk in a small village during the period of Bani Israel. He was dedicated to the worship of Allah and was known for his piety. One day three brothers decided to go for Jihad. But they had a sister and they did not want to leave her alone. So they went looking for someone to take care of her. The town people suggested to leave her with Barsisa because of his piety. So they went to him and requested him.

“I seek refuge in Allah from the cursed Shaitan,” he replied firmly refusing to do so. He feared falling into sin (due to the potential fitnah involved). Then Shaitan whispered to Barsisa, who had a soft heart, “What if they can’t find someone good and leave her with someone evil, wouldn’t that be your fault?”

Because of his compassion for others, he changed his mind.


She stayed in a separate house opposite the church. He did this so it would be easy for him to leave her food outside the church and she could come to get it herself. But after sometime, Shaitan returned and whispered, “Why don’t you leave the food closer to her, so people don’t see her moving back and forth alone.”

Barsisa agreed and started leaving the food outside her house. But Shaitan wasn’t satisfied. When some time passed, he returned: “Why don’t you go inside the house and leave it on the table, so that no one sees her coming out and going in alone all the time?”

This was dangerous. But Barsisa agreed and he started leaving the food on the table.

Then as time went by, Shaitan said, “Why don’t you talk to her, she is all alone and has no one to talk to.”

So Barsisa started talking to her from behind a door (so as to screen himself). But this would lead them to almost shouting to hear each other. Shaitan then tempted Barsisa to just go in and talk to her comfortably, and finally, he (Shaitan) had got them alone in a room. Shaitan had accomplished the most difficult part. Soon Barsisa and the woman fell into illicit sexual relationship.

The story doesn’t end here. The woman became pregnant and delivered a baby. Barsisa was now extremely nervous. Shaitan returned with his whispering and advice, “What have you done? Look at the result of your evil. Get rid of the evidence otherwise the brothers will kill you!”

Barsisa killed the baby and buried it in the same room the woman was in. “Do you think you can kill the child and expect the mother not to tell anyone?!” was the next whisper. So Barsisa killed the woman and buried her too along with the baby. He made a fake grave outside and when her brothers returned, he informed them that she died of illness. After seeing the grave, they made du’a for her and returned home accepting Allah’s decree.


Later that night, Shaitan came to them in their dream and informed them about what Barsisa had done and where their sister and her child were actually buried. The brothers got up upset and confused. They went and dug up the fake grave to find it empty. Then they dug up the place Shaitan showed them in the dream and found the child and their sister.

Furious, the brothers caught Barsisa to take him to the ruler. Barsisa knew he would be given the death penalty. Shaitan came to Barsisa for the final time and appeared in the form of a man. This time he revealed himself and told Barsisa he was the one whispering the thoughts. Shaitan said only he could save Barsisa because he was the one who put him in trouble in the first place, and he would save him only if Barsisa made Sajdah to him. Barsisa, out of desperation, falls into prostration. This confirmed his Kufr (disbelief) and Shaitan left saying, “I am free of you, I fear Allah, the Lord of the Universe!”

Barsisa was led away to his death. Allah’s refuge is sought from such an end.

Lessons from the story:

1. No human being is guaranteed safety from trials. This should keep us vigilant and on guard by seeking Allah’s help and guidance all the time.

2. Shaitan misleads people slowly and steadily in a step-by-step approach. He may even approach from an apparently good path – in the guise of compassion and mercy. Had Shaitan first asked Barsisa to commit fornication or murder or Kufr, Barsisa would have flatly refused. But Shaitan pulled Barsisa slowly, by tempting him to talk to her and spend time with her alone, until he committed illegal sexual intercourse, then murder out of anxiety, and then eventually Kufr out of exasperation. Shaitan eroded Barsisa’s Iman (faith) until he did things he would never had normally done.

3. Worship without knowledge is dangerous, just as knowledge without worship is. Ibn Qayyim commented on this story saying: “He based his life on worshipping Allah unknowingly, so Satan seized the opportunity and seduced him causing his disbelief.”

Knowledge and acting on Allah’s Religion is important. Had Barsisa known it would be wrong to talk to the woman like that and spend time with her alone, he may have been better equipped to tackle Shaitan’s whispers, which were in the guise of compassion and help.

4. We should never lose hope of Allah’s mercy. Indeed, He forgives all sins if one repents. Every mistake we make should remind us to turn back to Allah. We should not delay our repentance, because one sin leads to another. A smaller one leads to a bigger one. In this case, it went all the way up to Kufr. We should realize and desist from our mistakes in the initial stage itself before they get any bigger.

5. We should seek refuge in Allah when Shaitan whispers evil thoughts in our hearts. Turn any such thoughts away and stay far away from the people and places that may lead into such deeds. Focus instead on learning and doing good deeds. Shaitan is an open enemy, yet he cannot overpower us if we follow the straight path and seek the protection of Allah, the Lord of the Universe.

– Reference of the story: Ibn Kathir’s Stories of the Qur’an


5 Apr

Parvin is currently overwhelmed by the 3 tests , 2 assignments and 1 tutorial to be prepared/ handed up :S


I hate to prepare for tutorials! So unfair, other fac/ even majors dont have to do anything for tutorials. I am going to take more psych modules because you never need to prepare and attendance, tutorial participation is not taken into account 🙂 Unfortunately i cant escape from social work tutorials :S

Everyone is waiting for someone to take charge. Why must they be like that? Lazy people!

Losing weight strategies in the different cultures

3 Apr

From reader’s digest i found lying on my student’s table:

French: Eating together promotes eating less as talking forces one to eat slower. That in turn gives time for your body to tell you that you are full.

Brazilian: Eat just rice and beans. The best way is beans only.

Indonesian: They either fast or live on just rice and water.

Thai: Eat lots of spicy food to increase the metabolism.

Polish/Poles: Budget alot or eat at home. The time when people got too busy to cook at home saw an increase in obesity.

Germans: Eat breakfast! *75% of Germans eat breakfast*

Netherlands: Biking! They ride their bicycle to the supermarket or to work etc.

*I remember seeing separate traffic lights for bicycle and pedestrians in Stockholm when i was there i guess the culture in Sweden is quite similar since they are quite close by.*

Finland: Take up Nordic walking.  They walked with walking poles which helps them exercise their limbs while walking.

*I used to wonder why even the young needed walking sticks but turns out its their way of exercising*

Switzerland: Museli. It helps to keep one from being hungry that quickly.

* i did consume museli for health and budgetting reasons in Finland. They can be very expensive if there is a variety of dried fruits mixed together…i remember it can cost up to 5 to 6 euro for perhaps a small packet. Well after some time i bought plain cornflakes instead because it came in this big big packet 1kg! and it was cheap. I noticed my house mates mixing sugar when they eat museli so i did it as well for the cornflakes to add more taste*

Hungary: Pickles.

Norway: Hiking with the family every week or fortnight.

India: Yoga has been practiced for many years.

Japan: Afternoon nap.

*sayang, now it makes sense 😉 *

Mexico: Heavy lunch but light dinner so that by morning, you’d be hungry to eat breakfast and the cycle repeats.


1 Apr

Have you felt the beauty of a smile,

the warmth of a touch

or the bliss of simply watching

the world go by…

Share a little time and imagination

with us. Let’s indulge in Life’s Simple Pleasures

My sweet student gave me this and inside was a postcard (below)

Since life cant be sitting on a swing

sipping soya bean,

munching on doughnuts,

we can still spend a little part of our life doing just that

with the people we love.


You never fail to make me happy ~~

*I want to be forgetful like you and forget*

I love the feeling of how soft the rose feels after a 5 days.