Archive | October, 2011

A tale to learn from

31 Oct

A voyaging ship was wrecked during a storm at sea and only two of the men on it were able to swim to a small, desert like island. The two survivors, not knowing what else to do, agree that they had no other recourse but to pray to God. However, to find out whose prayer was more powerful, they agreed to divide the territory between them and stay on
opposite sides of the island.

The first thing they prayed for was food. The next morning, the first man saw a fruit-bearing tree on his side of the land and he was able to eat it’s fruit. The other man’s parcel of land remained barren!

After a week, the first man was lonely and he decided to pray for a wife. The next day, there was a woman who swam to his side of the land. On the other side of the island, again there was nothing!

Soon the first man prayed for a house, clothes, more food. The next day, like magic, all of these were given to him. However, the second man still had nothing!

Finally, the first man prayed for a ship, so that he and his wife could leave the island. In the morning, he found a ship docked at his side of the island. The first man boarded the ship with his wife and decided to leave the second man on the island. He considered the other man unworthy to receive God’s blessings, since none of his prayers had been answered.

As the ship was about to leave, the first man heard a voice from heaven booming, “Why are you leaving your companion on the island?”
“My blessings are mine alone, since I was the one who prayed for them,” the first man answered. “His prayers were all unanswered and so he does not deserve anything.”
“You are mistaken!” the voice rebuked him. “He had only one prayer, which I answered. If not for that, you would not have received any of my blessings.”

“Tell me, O God,” the first man asked the voice, “What did he pray for that I should owe him anything?”

“He prayed that allyour prayers be answered.”

For all we know, our blessings are not the fruits of our prayers alone, but those of another praying for us.

This is too good not to share…

My prayer for you today is that all your prayers are answered. Be blessed.

“What you do for others is more important than what you do for yourself”

This was shared with me by a friend, I hope you will share with your friends.

My Comment!

God answer everyone prayer (2:186) but, unfortunately, most of us either do not listen to God or do not know how to listen to God? The Quran says:

“Those who fear God, when a satanic thought touches them, they at once return to the Quran (al ziker) when lo! they see aright!….(7:201)”

So, God’s answer to our prayers is given in the Quran. All others means and sources are wrong. The Quran says:

” For Him alone is prayer in truth. Any other that they call upon besides Him hear them no more than if they were to stretch fourth their hands for water to reach their mouths but it reaches them not. This is the way of unbelievers: which is nothing but wandering in mind.(13:14)”

The believers seek from God only the Guidance. The rest they do themselves. And, of course, the only Divine Guidance is the Quran alone!

Read Quran – understand Quran – Act according Quran

Bashir (taken from my email)


The sky is a gorgeous blue today

24 Oct




Sundays affairs

23 Oct

The first wedding was our family friend’s son’s wedding. We didn’t get to see the bride and groom. However, we had a disturbing experience.

When we arrived, we were greeted warmly by the groom’s father and went to sit at a table where a woman was sitting alone. She started talking to us like we knew each other for a long time. I went to take food from the buffet with Mr Q. While walking back, someone stopped me and told me to beware of the lady sitting with us as they don’t know who she was and she has been asking people’s number. I was shaken and I’m not sure if the woman sensed my changed demeanor towards her.

I saw that my mother has written her address and home number on the piece of paper with her hand resting on it. I immediately grabbed the paper and passed it to Mr Q, true enough when we turned it over we saw many other telephone numbers of the people she collected.

She didn’t claim to know anyone but she did say her friend asked her to sit here, after that she grabbed someone and acted all friendly but it turns out that girl didn’t know her either.


She was talking to my parents’ ex-colleague all friendly telling about her 5 younger brothers, she is unmarried. Her youngest brother is 9 but she looks almost 40 herself… She claims to know the famous people and they were her relation.

After that my mother was a little freaked out what-more when she started talking to my father and mother butt in and told her he was always busy. She said that she was looking for a bride for her brother but couldn’t give any details as that her mother will deal with.

But if she really was, she should not be taking people ‘s contact instead be giving out her own.
Something was up with her but I couldn’t quite place it.

At the second wedding, we saw mainly the relatives! It was quite nice 🙂 it’s colour theme was golden yellow contrasted with black.





















Project Rebuild: Grief and Bereavement (dialogue)

22 Oct

This time, i dragged Mr Q to the dialogue session since it is a Saturday 🙂 I think there is no harm in learning more about matters so close to any of us. Of late i’ve been feeling that taking Social Work is the best thing because its so related to LIFE. During my lecture, the lecturer discussed about the issue so close to heart about housing and the HDB rules; watch a Get Real episode on how there are people falling through the cracks of the social safety net. We learn about relationships, about dealing with emotions; grief, loss etc.

i’m lovin’ it!


Project Rebuild is a series of dialogues which is focused on providing as much information and linking the various resources aimed at this group of people who might be experiencing grief and/or bereavement.

The first speaker was the most entertaining for me because she shared about her experience in Hong kong. She was a Singaporean but moved to Hong kong and is practicing there now. She shared her PLAYON model of working with bereaved kids. Very informational and useful definitely.

Patient with process

Leveredge non children’s potential

Acknowledge feelings

(Wh)Y is this an issue?

On with life


She left us with this,

“Remember to play after every storm.”

and this

“Birds fly, fishes swim and children play”

The second speaker was from HELP FSC, an agency which works with single parents and bereaved families. I think she covered alot of what i learnt in my Social work in medical settings lecture on the different effects of grief and the task of mourning. Interesting too of course.

The third speaker was a Palliative care physician who spoke of ‘composure tactics’ and caring for the professionals who have to deal with dying children and watching them suffer.

Q and A segment had an interesting question, ” Why do children repeatedly asks about the same issue? like where has daddy gone? Why does daddy have to die?”

The professionals said that narrative therapy was a way to make meaning and come to term with the loss. A lady who said she was a grieved mother shared about the culture of Boswana people and how they deal with death.

When there is a death amongst them, the community will share the pain of the grieving person when the person tells her story over and over again. After many repetitions, the person will come to terms with it and the community helps the healing process by sharing the pain. (it was a lot more clearer than how i am telling it because i remember only parts of it as my eye is almost closing as i had a few long days in a row and am exhausted).

Last words; grief doesnt go away, it remains with the person their whole life as they manage their emotions and regulate them.

Poem by Michael rosen

Sad is a place

Sad is a place that is deep and dark

Like the space under the bed

Sad is a place that is high and light

Like the sky above my head

When its deep and dark,

I dont dare to go there

When it’s high and light

I want to be thin air

The buffet included the mango pudding:)






Here is Mr Q’s art work. I was clearing out some of my school papers so that we’d have some space for the new books we bought.


Uni life can be so rich if…

21 Oct

…i had more friends to accompany me to events, seminars, dance workshops, all sorts of crazy workshops they have at NUS.

Currently, i am at the stage of my life in which friends and family are important people but i wont stop myself from doing what i like even if i do it alone. Similar to the stance i took when i was in Finland for exchange, something was up with the girls i travelled to Finland with so i didnt let it bother me and plan my journeys alone. If i were to wait for others, i would have not met the wonderful people on my journeys and witnessed the beautiful places (Masyallah).

Back to the matter at hand, rich university life if i had company to attend all the wonderful events. I signed up for a few to date just because the topic interest me and now i had the time to attend them.

Today’s event was a dialogue session; the Second China-India-Singapore Dialogue on Higher Education held at University Hall.

I was quite excited for it because education in the western world has received so much attention and recognition for as long as I’ve studied, besides education in Singapore of course. Of late, I have been reading and hearing on higher education in India and the richness of the Indian culture intrigues me.

There were 3 speakers in the first half of the session which i attended. I left after lunch as i had a lecture to attend.

The first speaker was the President of South University of Science and Technology of China. He spoke of challenges of setting up a new university and bringing it up to 1st class standards in the shortest possible time through the use of a different education model from the west. As science and technology is continually evolving beyond just the single discipline and employment opportunities are looking at not just the depth but breadth of knowledge as well, they are looking at abolishing department and having research institutes instead.

The second speaker was Professor Pankaj Chandra from an Indian Institute of Management (Bangalore) He discussed the higher education framework from a very macro perspective with regards to governance. Interesting point to note was that universities are around for hundreds of years and the difficulties of self-regulating and improving, moving forward. There are multitude of opportunities for the sector to grow, change and improve.

Lastly, Prof Tan Chorh Chuan, President of NUS.

Firstly i must comment on how he looks, very young! I imagined the President looking like the President of Singapore; matured with white thinnning hair. The President of NUS looked like he was in his 30s and really tall. I think many students dont know the Presidents/ Chairmans/ Deans of their school/ institutions like i didnt know how the Head of NYP School of Business Management looked like till perhaps the day of my graduation.

He shared alot of stuff i didnt know and it happened right here in Singapore like the corporatization of NUS in 2006 and what it involved and still going on.

After which, a Q and A followed and i quite enjoy some of the questions asked and comments made. One thing i took away was what Prof Zhu from China said when asked why are they trying to redesign the university model when the world’s best universities in the west have the model which is most used now througout the world? According to international rankings, you (China University which is aiming at a different model) wont score so well because the ranking system is according to a different education model. He also spoke of Steve Jobs and Bill Clinton who were drop-outs and so what is all the fuss about competing to be better in higher education?

I dont know if the Prof answer was to the point but i still liked it.

China and India have existed for so much longer than the west and have very rich cultures and long heritage thus they look at the world as a whole but the west breaks the world into many pieces and then try to put them together piece by piece.

I think he is trying to mean the different disciplines and how we have to look at them together.





Ah delicacies!

17 Oct

To carousel we went for hi-tea and had our lun-din. Can’t believe I am posting this while I’m starving. Oh well, we started with some light delicacies like the popish which was delicious, while he had pita and chicken shawarma (ah sweet memories of siwa) and some local rojak.

Vegetarian bee hoon and crab nuggets came together with my popiah. After some local food, we had some fresh raw sushi, salmon and little sandwiches.

There was chicken porridge, laksa, gado-gado, nasi lemak. We tried nasi lemak and chicken porridge and i really liked them.

Dessert was the best part! Spoilt for choices with chocolate fondue, cakes, puddings, tarts and our all time favorite – warm chocolate mousse(y) brownie with cold ice cream! 20111017-141428.jpg20111017-141636.jpg20111017-141707.jpg20111017-141721.jpg20111017-141732.jpg20111017-141747.jpg20111017-141800.jpg20111017-141820.jpg20111017-141901.jpg20111017-141916.jpg20111017-141943.jpg20111017-142006.jpg20111017-142023.jpg20111017-142035.jpg20111017-142046.jpg20111017-142110.jpg20111017-142122.jpg

Course :)

15 Oct



Arts and crafts

14 Oct

We had fun with the nine grains and the various spices by decorating our names in Tamil!





The one on blue is mine 🙂

The rest were done by my classmates. CLS 10 is the one done for Centre for Languages Studies 10th year anniversary which was celebrated today but I couldn’t join in the fun because of other commitments.

He is too distracting

14 Oct

The past week was a roller coaster. It’s not totally over yet as I have assignments to complete. My list of things is getting longer by the hour. I really wonder why I feel more stressed out this semester despite taking 3 modules instead of the usual 4-5 modules. Perhaps because I have to go to school 5 times a week? Plus all the other commitments I have is weighing me down.

It has unfortunately come to a point where I have to go to school to complete work because the home is too distracting with little Mukhlis. He was born 2 semesters ago but it has not affected me that badly till now. Of course I feel sad, it’s not just he comes looking for me but I will seek him out, watch as he sleeps, carry him so I can hug him *sigh* hope my mother understands and doesn’t think I’m just running away from babysitting.

He is growing up so fast

10 Oct

He never fails to make me smile. We need babies to make our lives less stressful, only if they are not yours because they can be a handful too! Lol!

I still love him!


This morning; I was sitting next to where he was sleeping. He stirred in his sleep and slowly his large eyes fluttered open. I just watched him and even tried to hide behind some pillows in the hope that he will go back to sleep.

He looked at me. No smile. Then he stretched his little body and twisted himself out of the blanket his parents wrapped around him on this rainy morning. He sat there looking at me.

Me: ok come here I’ll carry you. ( gesturing towards me at the corner of the bed)

He just shook his head indicating no. (Actually he does that for anything because I think he doesn’t know how to nod yet. It’s really cute when he wants to stay with me because i was showing him angry birds or some nursery rhyme, he will refuse to go to anyone because he wants to watch some more. )

Me: ok I shall go now

He made a soft crying sound and crawled towards me and into my arms.